I'm sure a lot of people can relate to the money-hungry aspect. Over the last few years, I've known that I'm in a place in my life where I need to separate myself from a few things. I can't do that without money. I can't do that without a means to take care of what I need to take care of. And surprising (or not), I just don't make the money online that I need to. Every time that something would happen where I simply just could not take it anymore, I would push forward and create another responsibility for myself online. I was trying to make more money... but, really, very little I do helps. I work and work and work and I am no more closer to making any kind of steady income than I was after my first few months into my online work. Getting an outside job in my neck of the woods is next to impossible. And it's actually non-existent for someone of my skill set. This is coupled with the unique needs of having two small children where you have little to no luck keeping a dependable babysitter, much less paying for one.
Then comes passion. I would justify a lot of time wasting activities to passion, whether it be creating a new blog or website, being the admin of a forum, spending a little too much time on Twitter or Facebook because I told myself that I not only enjoyed it, but it was good for networking. All it has done is further bury me into this world of struggling to make ends meet and in the end has reaped very few rewards whether monetary or mentally satisfying.
Don't get me wrong. I'm not quitting. As a matter of fact, I will still be writing my fiction and poetry with vigor (that will never change). But there are a number of things that I'm cutting out. I will no longer be admin to the forums and other blogs I currently take part in. I will no longer be spending as much time on things like Facebook or Twitter. I will continue to write in an independent fashion for the Yahoo! Contributor Network and hope to keep my state-based Yahoo!News beat for a long time. I will also continue my local website as I still feel like I could do some good with it, especially with the following I have. I will also continue to write on this blog and keep this site up-to-date with my career progress.
This change of heart came after some computer problems caused me to be without internet for over two weeks. It was horrible at first. I panicked and wondered how in the world I'd get by without working like I was. But after the first week, I realized that it didn't matter as much as I thought it did. I was making the residuals, so it wasn't like I wasn't making anything. I was losing some upfront pay but overall, it's not like I'd lost everything. I realized that I needed to spend more time on my fiction. I also realized that my kids needed more of me than I'd been giving them by working so hard on things that ultimately did nothing for my dreams or needs. It was a wake up call. One that I desperately needed and one that I'm thankful for.
It's time to move forward. With my edits almost done on my new fantasy novel, I should be ready to begin submitting within the next month. It took me a year to complete but it was worth the wait.
Thanks to everyone for their continued support.