This year, I find myself slightly on the Grinch side of the holidays.  I've been fighting with my spouse over the tree; he has to have a real friggin' tree every year and of course, unless you get the super duper expensive trees, they are going to shed needles all over the floor.  Last year, we had to spring for a new vacuum after pine needles clogged our old one up.  Not to mention that I just don't have time to be vacuuming every single day.  "So I'll clean it up," he says and I know that's a lie from previous experience.  He'll wait around and let it sit for days, even weeks, until I've gone completely insane and clean it myself.  I would rather have a nice artificial (preferably prelit) tree that I can easily manage (stress free!) in a household of limited time and little ones.  It's almost one week before Christmas and we still don't have a tree.  Our standoff ends with me conceding because I don't want to ruin the kids' Christmas.  I don't see what the big deal is. 

Nevertheless, this is just one argument in a string of arguments and disagreements that have been the theme of 2010 over all.  But I won't bore you with the details.  I don't normally get online and vent about personal problems so that's all I will say about it.  In 2011, things will either improve or they won't.  It seems simple in theory at least.

Other family and household problems have cropped up over the last year, too, which adds to the solemnness of the season.  But my kids are so excited about Christmas, even if I'm not and I won't ruin it for them.  This is the first year my oldest son has completely looked forward to Santa and the presents and the gift giving and so I'll put on a happy face and enjoy the season where my kids are concerned.  It really does make things worthwhile to see the happiness and look of awe on their faces.

This will be the last post of the year for this blog.  I'll be spending the next few days minimizing my content writing list and will spend the rest of the year continuing my novel-in-progress. (62,000 words and counting!)  Hopefully, without having to write content, I'll be able to hit it hard.  My goal is to complete the rough draft before February. 

And on that note, I wish my readers happy holidays and season's greeting, however you celebrate this time of year.  Although, I feel bah, humbug a bit, I don't wish humbugs on anyone else. 

Grammar rules when writing dialogue seems to be a tough spot for many writers. Over a year ago, I wrote the Rules of Grammar and Punctuation in Dialogue Writing (click here) which has had tens of thousands of page views and has been shared across multiple writing sites. Now, I'm going follow up on that with two more dialogue writing rules, rules which I've seen broken many times.

Read More...

While researching markets in a Writer's Digest market book, I came across Silver Leaf Books, a listing that seemed like a good fit on first glance for one of my projects.  While most listings in Writer's Digest are on the up and up, it is more than a good idea to research any listing fully.  Find out what other writers think about them; find out if all is legit.  While I can't out right say that Silver Leaf isn't a legitimate publisher, there is one aspect to their business that is questionable.  When I went to their website, here is what I found:

This is on their submission page as of this posting date:

"Is Publishing Right for You ?
By submitting to Silver Leaf Books, you are hoping to have us sign you as an author, publish your books, and provide you with a royalty for the sales of your books. Since the cost associated with the publication process is ours, there is a fairly lengthy application and review for consideration of each and every title that comes in. We look not only for good writing, a good storyline, and a marketable idea, but also for the right author (outlook and persistence).

If you are looking to just publish your book without going through the review process, to maintain 100% control over your project, receive all revenues and not just a royalty, and do it all yourself with some help, then Silver Leaf Books is not for you. However, if this is the model you desire, then we would recommend visiting our sister-company, Creative Strategists for a quote to help your book get in print. Creative Strategists provides you with quality service and a professional product.
If publishing is right for you, please select the appropriate link for submission guidelines..."

There is just something that didn't sound quite right about all that.  Is publishing right for me?  If it wasn't, I wouldn't be spending hours researching the appropriate markets. 

This sounds like it is specifically targeting writers who haven't been in the submitting stage very long.  This is targeting writers who really have no clue (yet) that submitting is a marathon and takes time, care, and patience.  This is targeting writers who have the unfounded notion that by publishing traditionally, they will lose rights to their work and it will spiral away from them.  In other words, it sounds as though they are trying to discourage writers from submitting the traditional route while promoting their self publishing company.

Is it common for a traditional press to own a self-publishing company?

Common?  Maybe.  There are a number of companies out there who have both but most remain separate for good reason.  They have enough sense not to mix one with the other and they keep marketing for one another separated, too, as well it should be.  It's understandable in a time of economic downturn to expand on services in order to offset the tremendous cost of traditional publishing.  But it is simply bad business to use one to promote the other.

It's really insulting to a writer  who is seriously researching markets for their work to come across something like this.  Furthermore, it is discouraging to a newer writer, who goes ahead and submits to them, only to have a rejection come back... with an offer to publish under their self-publishing company.  If that isn't sketchy, I don't know what is.

Beware

It's my advice that you need to be aware of companies such as this.  This is no better than a vanity press taking your submission and saying "Congrats! Your story has been selected for upcoming publication! Now all you have to do is buy the anthology it will be published in!"  Um, no thanks.

Asking writers to submit while pushing these services onto them might initially seem like a good idea (to them and an inexperienced writer) but in the end, experienced writers will see the shadiness in this.

Here is the Silver Leaf site.  For additional reading, here is a thread on Absolute Write Forums about Silver Leaf.  In a related topic, I found this article on Suite 101 about the differences between self publishing, vanity, and subsidiary publishing.  I get the terms confused myself sometimes so this was a good read for me.  Maybe it will be for you, too.

Final Thought

Taking a moment to make a final thought here, I realize that I have a lot of beginners who read my advice.  So here's the ultimate advice.  If you are going the traditional publishing route, stand firm in that.  If any agent or publisher tries to get you to pay for anything, always approach with heavy caution.  And don't let these "professionals" tell you that your work isn't up to industry standards and you'd be better off self-publishing at "Insert name of company here".  Chances are, they are being paid to refer you and had no interest in ethically representing or publishing your work in the first place.  When in doubt, ask on a writer's forum or throw me an email at pamelacaves@rocketmail.com.

Peace, happiness, and determination,

Pamela

My childhood wasn't all roses and sunshine.  Stability wasn't something that I had when I was younger.  As a child, I felt as though I was pushed from one household to the next; from my mom to my dad to my stepmom to my aunts and uncles back to my stepmom to my dad (and then both as they got back together) and eventually to my grandparents where after a few years, I finally put my foot down and told everyone where I wanted to go which was back to my dad and stepmom.  All throughout that time of scuttling about, I felt like I was a burden on others and no one really wanted me.  I was a mouth to feed, expensive, and I felt like I was a bad child which was why no one wanted me.  I don't want to make anyone feel bad; it's simply how I perceived things.  Most importantly, my birth mother giving me up when I was little (which started that chaotic spiral) has had a HUGE impact on my life and this perception.  I've always felt like I wasn't worthy of anyone good or I couldn't do anything great because my own mother didn't want me.  This impact has affected my personal relationships, my work, and most importantly, it has impacted my own perception and experience of motherhood.

Let's jump forward.  I'm the mom of two little ones.  Being a mom is the toughest job on the face of the planet.  Not only are you worried about your job as the sole caregiver and protector of these precious and wonderful little people, but you're also criticized at every single turn.  From your decisions what to feed them, to discipline, to the television programs they watch, to how you handle a mid-store meltdown, almost every person out there is judging you and knows better than you do how to raise your children (whether they have children or not!).  Along with the clarity of life that comes with motherhood, you know in the back of your mind to turn a deaf ear and do things that you know are instinctively the best for you and your children, but it doesn't make it any less hurtful when someone says you're a terrible mom because you bottle fed your baby or because gave your child a cookie instead of an apple or because you swatted them on the butt for trying to run out into traffic and the list goes on.  It's never ending... and it's maddening.  And sometimes it's enough to make you second guess yourself even when you know you're right.

For me, because of my own childhood, I feel like I'm being judged more than the average mom.  If the daughter of a junkie grows up to be a junkie with children she neglects, too, it's expected.  It's why Dr. Phil talks about breaking the cycle so much.  The odds are remarkably high that a child will do the exact same thing as a parent that he or she experienced as a child.  If they were abused, the odds are that they will become an abuser.  I've actually witnessed first hand this cause and effect.

And I am determined not to make the same mistakes.  There is no way in hell that I will ever just hand over my children to someone else.  While I have had to learn to tune out the criticisms and judgments, I do feel like I'm on a mission.  I'm out to prove to the world that I am a better mother than my own birth mom.  But that doesn't come without it's own drawbacks.

I have to physically and mentally restrain myself to keep from going overboard.  I'm often very vocal and opinionated in my own community when it comes to children's issue which isn't always a good thing.  I have to struggle to keep myself in check that I'm raising my children to eventually become adults and that I can't bypass every pain and struggle for them or they will never learn how to endure or deal with those situations.  I want to shield all the bad things from them, things that I experienced but to what point?  Yeah, I have something to prove but I also have to remember that I can' t strip them of every bad experience if I want them to be well rounded.

I guess in a way, I've already proven that I'm a better mother.  While I will never know why she did what she did, I can rest in the knowledge that at least from me, it will not continue.

A lot of writers have story ideas that derive from deep sleep dreams.  I often have such ideas.  Some of them churn out, some don't.  But this one, for some weird reason, did.  And I am pleased with the result.

I had a dream that I was in my town's town hall with a lot of other people.  My children were with me (which is odd because when I go to the town hall, I rarely ever take my kids) and we were holed up because there were huge bird things trying to get at us.  I remember a part of my dream where in one of the rooms, there was an old lady sitting in a rocking chair telling us how those things were going to take all the kids.  And that was the extent of the dream.  Makes me wonder what I was eating (or maybe drinking?) before I went to bed that night.

Something told me it would make a good story but I'd never written a "monster" story before.  This was probably the weirdest thing I'd ever attempted.  Using real world elements, regardless of genre, is what makes a story so I had to make that a focus first.  My main character, Ashley, escaped an alcoholic and abusive husband by moving to the small town of Turnville where she thinks she's going to live peacefully.  She wants a life for her son where they no longer have to live in fear.  But when ole' Gerty scares her son with talk of bird creatures, Ashley goes to the police chief.  And the story goes from there as Ashley realizes she has more in common with her nemesis than she thought.

If you're interested in buying a copy, click here for buying options.  Thank you for your support!